About

First off, it is my hope not to spread confusion in the world. It is better that you contemplate things and discover for yourself. We all have just as much authority to seek and find as any other being when it comes to our creator.

Now, I struggle with obsessing. Perhaps it’s the way I was raised, or maybe it’s related to OCD, ADHD, or a combination of both. Regardless, it does get in the way of living. So, I plan to use this website to organize my thoughts on faith, the Bible, and, more importantly, God. If I can focus and find peace, that’s the goal. Perhaps it might also be helpful to others who grapple with these ideas, although I don’t intend to actively promote this page. My only readers will likely be myself and my sister, maybe my therapist and other family and friends.

I’ve found the coping statements at the following URL to be helpful: coping-statements-for-christians-with-ocd-scrupulosity. If you’re obsessive or if your faith is hindering your life, do check them out.

May the peace of God be with you.


How to cultivate the fruit of the spirit.

How do people think of the Fruit of the Spirit? Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control; you know, the ones listed in Galatians 5:22 and 5:23. Most Christians are very familiar with them, and they are often one of the first things exposed to children raised in Christian households.

They are taught as qualities that a person can and should develop. However, I believe this may be the wrong way to think of them. Rather than striving to embody these qualities consciously, little is taught about the means to actually cultivate them. Being more than just a list of good qualities to be rattled off and put on display, why is it never posed as follows: “Here’s how you get the Spirit, and then the fruit naturally grows”? Is it a lack of faith by the church? Imagine if you taught a person how to have the Spirit, without explicitly mentioning the qualities that come with it. Would they naturally start exhibiting those qualities?

Otherwise, it’s akin to trying to save yourself—can you truly be loving without the Spirit? Can you experience joy without the Spirit? Can you practice patience without the Spirit? I don’t know. The book of Galatians heavily addresses flawed thinking related to salvation through law-following or outward appearances. At the time, circumcision was a significant outward physical sign. But in a similar manner, one could appear to have love, joy, or patience, yet it might not be genuine. It could be an affectation not backed up by the Spirit.

Rather than actively striving to develop the qualities of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, could we simply have faith in the Spirit and allow the fruit to express itself as it desires?

Luke 11:13 "If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children: how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him?"

So, in response to the question of how to cultivate the fruit of the Spirit, perhaps we simply need to ask for the Holy Spirit?


The Word of God.

Does religion become hollow when we're more concerned with what we believe; rather, than with whether or not it's true?
Do we need to be careful to not cling too tightly to what is simply our idea of God?

Is it neccessary to put faith in the Bible or give it undue importance? A phrase such as "the Bible is the inerrant word of God" comes to mind. Well yes, but nobody ever really says why...

Jesus himself almost singlehandedly dismantled that idea, yet people still continue obsessively searching... and yes I'm partly looking at myself.

John 5:39 "Search the scriptures; for in them ye think ye have eternal life: and they are they which testify of me."

It was stated in rebuke to the Pharisees, the scriptures didn't matter or help them.
I fear the scriptures may not matter or help us either.

The first 5 verses of the book of John lend credibility to the idea that the Word of God is creation itself.

John 1:1-5 "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. The same was in the beginning with God. All things were made by him; and without him was not any thing made that was made. In him was life; and the life was the light of men. And the light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not."

Besides does any sincere child of God believe that His will would cease to be done without a book? I'm not trying to belittle the Bible, I'm trying to belittle the idea that God's word is limited to the Bible, or that the Bible deserves more attention than God, or maybe even that salvation is dependent upon the words in the Bible. Maybe the Bible needs less attention in your life? Maybe paying more attention to the reality God has presented is a much better way to live in the Word?


Becoming known.

As someone who suffers from self-doubt and uncertainty, there are few verses that fill me with dread the way that the following do.

Matthew 7:21-23 Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.

What could these verses mean? And what is the will of the Father in heaven?

John 15:15 "Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you."

Jesus gives two commandments in Matthew and one in John.

John 15:10 "If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father's commandments, and abide in his love."

John 15:12 "This is my commandment, That ye love one anther, as I have loved you."

John 15:17 "These things I command you, that ye love one another."

Matthew 22:37-40 "Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets."

Is there fundamentally no difference between loving God and loving others?
Or if that sounds rather blasphemous maybe I mean, is loving others a way to love or a part of loving God?
It would seem to me that loving one another is an act of loving God, in the same way that feeding the people you care about is an act of loving them. There are many ways to love and being a provider isn't the only one.

There are lots of sins and failures to obsess over. But maybe the one that Jesus commands is the one that needs to be given more attention.
If you are following these commandments the others pretty much just fall into place. It seems easy to obsess about the concrete followable ones, but how to do the first and second, which are loving God and loving others?
Most of the time the law is broken, it is a failure to be loving first and only secondly the specific commandment.

If you asked me in what ways or how I love God or if I was doing it with all... well, I might be at a loss for words.
Maybe, it's a question of when or where does love begin or end or where should it begin and end? Maybe our own ability to love is extremely limited, but where does God's love begin and end?

Take the accounts of the thief on the cross and the adulterer who was going to be stoned.

The thief was given this statement after his interaction with Jesus.
Luke 23:43 "And Jesus said unto him, Verily I say unto thee, Today shalt thou be with me in paradise."

The adulterer this statement.
John 8:11 "She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more."

So, it seems like failing at those two is not a preclude from love.


John 15:14 "Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you."

It seems that by loving others you become a friend of Jesus'.
Maybe it needs to be an act of faith? Just loving others in the ways you know how to and in the ways you are capable of and trusting that Jesus will know you when that day comes. Regardless of your failures or iniquities.




These portions from Luke and Mark also seem pertinent to the topic.

Luke 9:47-50 "And Jesus, perceiving the thought of their heart, took a child, and set him by him, And said unto them, Whosoever shall receive this child in my name receiveth me: and whosoever shall receive me receiveth him that sent me: for he that is least among you all, the same shall be great. And John answered and said, Master, we saw one casting out devils in thy name; and we forbade him, because he followeth not with us.
And Jesus said unto him, Forbid him not: for he that is not against us is for us."

Mark 9:37-41 "Whosoever shall receive one of such children in my name, receiveth me: and whosoever shall receive me, receiveth not me, but him that sent me. And John answered him, saying, Master, we saw one casting out devils in thy name, and he followeth not us: and we forbade him, because he followeth not us. But Jesus said, Forbid him not: for there is no man which shall do a miracle in my name, that can lightly speak evil of me. For he that is not against us is on our part. For whosoever shall give you a cup of water to drink in my name, because ye belong to Christ, verily I say unto you, he shall not lose his reward."


Can God be known?

Explore the meaning of the unknown God in Acts?